Step 9-GIFTS!!!

When it comes to the whole gift thing. You will see below that there are a lot of ways to stay green-both by giving to charity, and by asking for environmentally conscious gifts. I feel that the most important thing here, however, is to not get carried away when you are registering. Really sit down with your fiance, and talk about what you want, and what you NEED. What you would buy for yourself if money wasn't an issue. Don't register for crap that you will never use just because someone else is footing the bill. Be realistic. If you don't use it, then it is wasteful...I don't care what it is! (For the record, they don't mention it here, but there is a new trend of asking people for money. I want to address it as an etiquette side note: I really want a house right now, and was seriously thinking of sending one of those poems asking for cash. I did some asking around of my guests-both relatives and friends, and found that not one person thought that it was a good idea. No one. The general thought is-this is a wedding, not a fundraiser. So Jimmy and have a created a small registry of things that we love, and are letting people know that we are saving for a house, so gifts of money are great as well. I am hoping that this is well received, and so far it seems to be going well...end of side note.) So here are some ideas from the sierra club:

~asking for gifts to charity instead of material goods

This is a good idea for those of you out there who have what you need. Perhaps this is your second marriage, or you are both very financially secure, and you don't feel the need to ask for gifts. (LUCKY YOU!) Find a charity that really speaks to who you are as a couple. There are so many wonderful charities out there; local, national, and international. Research your charity, and make sure that they really do what they say they do! Ultimately this is a wonderful idea, if you can afford to do it! (And I imagine that you rack up some pretty good karma points!)

~registering with the I Do Foundation or another site that gives a percentage of gift purchases to your chosen cause.

This is so cool! I have gone to the site, and looks like you need to register your wedding with them, like you would with any wedding site, and then you can set up for 6% of all of your registry purchases to go to charity...could it be that simple? Check it out yourself at: www.idofoundation.org I will too. Let's compare notes. Has anyone done it? I love to hear if it was a good experience! Do tell!

~registering with stores that offer local, fair-trade, handmade, organic, or other eco-friendly products like Branch, Gaiam, Greenfeet, GreenSage, Ten Thousand Villages, UncommonGoods, or VivaTerra.

Love it! Check! This is a great time to get that kitchen composter that you have been dying for!

~registering for outdoor gear or contributions to an eco-friendly honeymoon

Have so much fun with this one...I believe that we have discussed my feelings on camping in step 4. Enough said. (AKA-do not buy me a gift card to REI. It would be wasteful of you. ;-)

~creating a custom wish list of eco-friendly items like a fresh-produce subscription from a local farm, organic gardening supplies, organic linens, park and museum passes, gift certificates to organic restaurants, and subscriptions to green publications or memberships in green causes

This one requires a little more work and imagination on your part, but aren't we all here because we are creative and uniquely minded folks? There are sites all around (such as my registry.com) where you can create a list of items that you would like (as long as you can buy it online, then you can put it on your registry!) If there are items that can't be done that way, then create a special registry for your guests to receive via email, or on your wedding site. For those folks who like to buy gifts the old fashioned way, you can have your Maid of Honor send them a hard copy...just make sure that she does it on recycled paper! ;-)

~For your favors, give something your guests will really use and enjoy, not disposable plastic souvenirs.

Ok, so my mantra about this is as follows: Do your guests a favor, and skip the typical "favor." Because no one likes Jordan Almonds, or a small thing of bubbles, or a key ring with your name on it, and if they told you that they did...they were being nice. Jimmy and I are donating a tree to a local park. (This goes along with our unspoken theme of "A Tree Grows in Brooklyn. Now it will be quite literal.) I am soooooo excited about this idea, I can't tell you. Really you could donate to any charity on behalf of your guests, and make a little announcement, or put a note about it at the top of your menu/or program. Put an announcement on home made paper in a frame at the reception table letting everyone know that you have made a donation in their name. It can be for whatever amount you put aside for your favors. Every little bit counts! And let me tell you...your guests will truely thank you for a gift that they don't have to shove in their purse to be polite, and then leave in the hotel. (with love...this is what they will be doing.)

For arguments sake, let's just say that you really feel that you MUST give them SOMETHING that they can hold...here are a few ideas (Courtesy of the Sierra Club, that I think people will actually like. ;-)

~Gourmet organic chocolates or another organic or local food item. LOCAL FOOD! This is great for welcome bags for out of town guests as well!

~attractive bags of fresh or dried organic herbs

~seeds in a commemorative container

~reusable cloth tote bags

can you ever have enough of these? I am using them to hold my attendants gifts as well! LOVE IT!

~a small plant

These can also go on the dinner tables as lovely decor. Talk about two birds with one stone!

~natural soaps

PS. These are easy to make...and home made gifts are so much more special. (And cheaper. ;-)

~place cards made of seeded paper that can be planted at home

~soy or beeswax candles

ehem...you know my thoughts...soy.

~a compact fluorescent light bulb

ok, so you will look like a bit of a nerd here, but it will bring awareness, it will be a GREAT conversation starter, and it IS dead useful.

~a downloadable playlist of your favorite songs

I got one of these recently, and liked it quite a bit. Cute idea, and very personal. You can even have them done up nicely at a site such as www.ourweddingcd.com Not too hard to remember. lol. I don't think that they use eco-friendly products though, so maybe doing it yourself is a better option. Depending on how crafty you are!

For your helpful, loyal attendants, you'll want to up the ante a little, perhaps with:

~gift baskets of organic skin-care products

~recycled jewelry, wallets, handbags, or drinking glasses

~selections of organic coffees, teas, and chocolates

~recycled paper journals and stationery

~great bottles of organic wine

As always, I recommend to keep it local! Support your local markets and artisans. It is a great way to create a hallmark for the event, and it makes your gifts one of a kind!

Step 8. Picture Perfect...

So back to our list of ways to "green up your celebration," ways to "get your green on," ways to "make everyone pay attention only to you because you are the queen of the universe..." Ok, not so much the last one, although I am fine with that, if it does happen...

So, our friends at the Sierra Club have this to say about your wedding pictures:

Whether you prefer film or digital photographs, look for a photographer who will do digital proofs to save paper and chemicals. Avoid single-use cameras, but ask friends with digi-cams to share their photos with all the guests online in a free Flickr group or Snapfish group room you set up for your wedding.

Ok...I am sooooooo fine with this. We are going digital because it is cheaper, and we were more interested in finding the right photographer for us, than in getting a bunch of prints that we don't even like. (note: Many photographers have online galleries where you and your guests can purchase prints. And, if they do, and you can afford it, order through them. Snapfish is a cool idea, but it feels a bit sneaky to me to go this route if your photographer offers to print for you. Or at the very least, ask them if they are ok with it.) And yes Yes YES! to having friends bring the digitals! Nothing better than checking out your awesome wedding on someone else's facebook profile two days after the event! (I will of course be toting my "mino flip" to get snippets of the day from my P.O.V. (and sharing with you...my avid readers.) Super fun!


PS. Speaking of finding the right photographer for us...did we EVER!!! Her name is Kelly Guenther, and she has won...wait for it, wait for it...a PULITZER! (So, she is pretty much a genius.) The main reason that we went with her, in addition to her laid back style (And her amazing carriage house apartment in Brooklyn Heights), is that she takes the most amazing photo journalistic photos!!!!



I was deathly afraid of the "gazing" photos. (Pictured here) Listen, If this "just happened," then that is totally cool, but if they stood there for 10 minutes taking pictures while trying to emote "love" for each other....my stomach hurts just thinking about it. Much to my surprise and delight, we found Kelly right off the bat. (I think that we booked her before the hall! lol) She had worked with a few brides that I knew, and I loved their photos. (She is also reasonably priced for the NYC area.) So we are phyched all around...




Ok, so the message here? Don't print anything unless you know that you want it! That shouldn't be too difficult, right? Check.

We interrupt this checklist to bring you news of a dress...

That's right! I want to report to you all-the millions of you waiting with baited breath-that I filmed the TV show-Say Yes To The Dress! (To be aired sometime next year)II have tried on some wedding dresses, and I have an update...

1. Kleinfelds is insane...who knew that dresses were so important? Apparently they are...and somehow when you are there, you believe in the power of the dress. (They use feminine pronouns when referring to them, as in, "Let's see how you look in "her.") I was treated like a princess, and my friends were treated like queens...because they are gay men. (cracking myself up here.) We had a Kleinfelds first, and they let Josh try on one of the dresses! He looked lovely, if a bit furry on top to be wearing so much detail in the bodice... sadly, they don't allow photos at Kleinfelds, or we would have quite a few here...he looked something like this:



...and as a side note, I am pretty sure that one of the salesmen at Kleinfelds had a crush on my friends...not one of them in particular so far as we could tell, but on all of them as a unit. Thank you salesman, said crush made everyone feel special. :-)

2. Filming a TV show is a funny thing. Especially a reality show! First there is a camera person in the dressing room with you...yeah..."Hi, so, um, I didn't wax yet this month, so...Oh, sure, you can put the microphone there." Then, once you are in the dress, they make you stand still for long moments while they film each dress, while your friends are going, "You look like you are in pain! Stop it!" Then you say something, and then they say, "Can you say that again?" and when you do, you sound like Tonto..."ME...LIKE...DRESS" In the interview, you know that they are looking for specific things, so you start wondering if you said the right thing, and stop thinking about what you are saying...and are like, "Wait...what? What did I say?" The other funny part is at the end when they ask you to comment on your experience in the present tense...but it isn't. (As though you are commentating on a baseball game, but it has already happened) IE. Them: "What was it like when you tried on the dress that Matt said looked like a table cloth?" Me: "I am in the dress, and I am thinking, "It isn't that bad, is it?" But I know that he is telling me the truth!" But it is an odd thing to do, so again with the old Tonto voice: ME...IN..UGLY DRESS...THINK...MATT...TRUTH!" Somebody save me!!

3. All in all, I had a lot of fun, and it got me really excited about the wedding. :-) So on to the dress commentary:


4. I am sad to report that The Cotton Bride Line by Chris Cole for Kleinfelds wasn't my favorite. I love the idea of it, but none of the "Green" dresses suited my style. (They were all a bit plain and hippy dippy) I think that my friend Matt called it when he said that the best one looked like "My Grandmothers Table Cloth." (I wonder if that line will make it on the show? We were a bit insane, and brutal. We caused a ruckus in general, and I really couldn't tell if they were amused, or annoyed....I guess we will find out when the show airs! lol)

5. All of this said, I did find one in particular that was especially lovely (and silk which is sustainable).....and cost 3000 dollars...GULP!

Sooooooo....what is a girl to do? Oh, I don't know.....google the name of the dress, and find a woman selling it on Craigslist two towns over from her parents for 1000 bucks? Yeah, that's what she said! WHOOOO HOOOO!!! What do you guys think?




It is simple, but not "boring", and I think that it is super flattering. So if I end up getting the dress from this woman, I will being keeping it green, and buying used!!! I am super pumped about being able to pick this green option-for the planet and my pocket! (Which has become my new mantra...WHAT WOULD THE GURU SAY????)

As for the possibility of a second dress...I am not sure at the moment where I stand, but will keep you updated!

Step 7-Eat Drink and Be Merry!

Showcase green gustatory pleasures (and spoil your guests) by basing your menu around local, organic, and seasonal foods. Don’t forget the organic wine, beer, and spirits, and the free-trade, shade-grown coffee and tea! Some tips:

~Ask the venue's preferred caterers and bakers if they can do your event organically.

Again, this is really about finding the right vendors for you. In Brooklyn, finding someone who ISN'T a part of the local/organic movement would be difficult, so I am lucky in that regard. My smaller parties in Binghampton and Boston respectively, might be a different story. "I will have to look into it, and get back to you." ~as said by Sarah Palin to Katie Couric.


~Find a local organic restaurant that does off-site catering.

Also-check out Tree Hugger's tips on how to have eco friendly cocktails and beverages! (This is from today! We are so on the the same page! Tree Hugger and I that is...)

~If your wedding won't be complete without a specific type of food, get married when it's in season.

As with flowers, keeping the food in season is good for the environment AND your pocketbook! (Check, and Check!)

~Find a caterer you trust to pick the best seasonal selections (since you may not be able to taste those exact items ahead of time).

Find a caterer you trust...thank you Captain Obvious.

~Consider vegitarian selections and seek out cruelty-free meats and wild, rather than farmed, fish.
A vegetarian option is a good idea anyway. It is less expensive, and more and more people are vegetarians these days. (Sometimes I opt for the veggie meal if I am unsure of the meat options. Let's face it-we are all more sketched out by an off-looking chicken wing, then we are by a wonky piece of asparagus. It is just the truth.)

~Making sure that the venue offers comprehensive recycling facilities, and ideally composting too.

This seems like a no brainer, but you never know...not everyone is on our page with this. See below for ideas on what to do if your venue doesn't recycle or compost.

~Have your cake decorated with organically grown flowers or other natural materials instead of plastic toppers.

Yeah-plastic topper? I am assuming that if you are interested in my blog, then you are not using a plastic cake topper with a bride and groom in cowboy hats, where the groom is pretending to run off the cake, and the bride is pulling him back on with a lasso. (By the way, I am pretty sure that I have actually seen that topper, somewhere...I will find it for you.) But in the event that you were thinking of doing this...stop it. Immediately.

~Rent real glassware, dishware, and linens instead of using disposables.

Renting is VERY common at weddings. (USING DISPOSABLES? What kind of wedding are we having here?) Renting is a great way to go. I used to work for a company called Broadway Party Rentals. If you are in NYC, check them out!

~Go for a chic eclectic look by mixing and matching thrift-store plates and dishes (and by donating them back when you are done).

This is a cool idea. I enjoy an eclectic array of old china on the table for fancy parties. (I use my Nana's old set-and her silver. I think that it is fun. :-) It would have to be a very particular style of wedding for this to work, but if it is your style, then go for it. I love this!

~Use biodegradable utensils and dishes made out of cornstarch, potatoes, wheat, or sugar cane--if your venue can compost them.

Hmmm...ok, if you are going for the disposables, then this is the way to do it, but I am still very anti disposables. (This is your wedding! Use a real fork, for the love of Pete!) If you are interested in finding this in general, check out Branch Home. They have lots of interesting eco-friendly products. (Including, the biodegradable fork. ;-)

~Make arrangements to donate leftover food to a local food bank or homeless shelter.

100%. I have mentioned this earlier, but in case you missed it: Recycling, composting, and donating anything that is unused at your event is super key if you want an eco friendly celebration. You can always investigate ways to do this on your own. (For starters, insist that your venue have separate containers for trash, and recyclables at you event.) And find a local shelter to donate food by going to my favorite website the http://www.idofoundation.org/about/August2003.html. They have bunch of places to try to set this stuff up on your "one-sies". If you don't want to do all the legwork, and really want to make sure that everything is re purposed to the fullest of it's potential, try The Special E. I haven't set anything up with them, but I am definitely investigating, and will let you know!

Step 6-The Decor...

There are so many ways that you can be eco-friendly when you decorate:

~opt for organic flowers
Ask your florist about this one, and if they don't use them, ask if they know someone who does. Organic can get a little pricey, so you may want to look into complimenting smaller arrangements with reusable items other than flowers (Like candles, etc.)

~find a florist who's diligent about recycling packaging and will source locally raised flowers
This is really just about finding the right vendor for you. Be upfront about what you want, and if they are as passionate as you are about it, then BINGO! And do your research: Find out what flowers are in season locally, and use them! (Again...it will also save you some do-re-mi) And the same goes for your menu BTW!

~have bridesmaids carry matching purses or silk bouquets instead of cut flowers
This is an iteresting idea...I mean after all, those $100+ bouquets usually end up sitting on a table somewhere. And that is economically wasteful too. Talk to your maids about it, and see what they think. (They might like a nice new purse, PS. It can double as your bridesmaid gift. Gosh, sometimes I amaze even myself with these ideas.) There are a LOT of cool places for purses these days. Check out Freddy and Ma. They aren't cheap, but they are about the same as a bouquet, when you think of it. You can design them yourself, and they are so bright and funky that you won't even miss the flowers!

~decorate with branches, dried grasses, grains, greens, berries, or live plants (potted or dried arrangements can double as favors)
~use leaves or other natural objects as place cards
These are sort of the same, so I will address them together, and I am going to address them with two words: Martha Stewart. And I don't just mean Martha Stewart Weddings. The craft ideas on her website are off the hook, and can be searched by season. I am getting married in the fall, and MOST of my decor ideas have come from the last three years of Martha Stewart Living (Sept, Oct and Nov issues) Poke around over there...there are truely some Good Things. DIY does not have to be Crafty Grandma and her Patchwork Quilt...channel your inner Martha! She will not let you down.

~choose beeswax or soy-based candles over those made with paraffin, a petroleum byproduct
I am about to sound off, so get ready. I am taking this one step further, and saying: JUST DO SOY! Why? I heard that bees are endangered...um, yeah, did you guys know this? Bees are endangered. And here is something that you might not know about me, but should probably know: I really love honey. Not a little bit, either. I am like freakin' Winnie the Poo. I eat it every morning in my yogurt...yum yum yum. It makes me super happy, and I would be wicked bummed if it wasn't around anymore, so guys, do me a favor, and buy your honey from responsible local companies. It isn't that hard. FOR THE LOVE OF BEES, BUY YOUR HONEY LOCAL!!! and...this brings me to my former point......buy soy candles. Which I am doing for my wedding! I found this website called etsy.com. It is a website where artisans can sell their stuff. (Pretty cool by the way, and an awesome way to buy local handmade gifts and such.) So I went to "Brooklyn/Soy/Candles" and found this cool guy named Marty who has a shop called Dew On A Petal Home. (Hippy much?) But seriously he makes all kinds of soy candles. All sizes and colors and scents that you can think of. They are not more expensive than regular candles, and get this: he has a buy back policy! He will buy back any candles that I don't use. He will even buy back the soy "wax" from the candles that I DO use, and repurpose them into new candles! I love this guy! And because he is in Brooklyn, I get to pick them up! My carbon foot print is getting smaller even faster than my waistline! ahem...So as soon as I know what I am getting, I am calling him to set it up! You guys should check out his webstore as well, if you need to buy any candles...think of the bees...for me. For my honey.


~arrange to have decorations moved from the ceremony to the reception (if you opt for separate sites)
This is a nice idea, and it saves you money. If money isn't an issue, maybe you could just make sure that you purchase decor that will be used for a while at the ceremony site. (If it is a church, for example, they may be able to use them for a few weeks as the altar decor...)

~throw biodegradable confetti or organic rose petals instead of releasing butterflies
huh? Is releasing butterflies some kind of new trend? Who is releasing butterflies? I have never heard of or seen anything like this. Am I behind the times on this one? I will say, that at the last wedding that I was at, there was some kind of bird seed/confetti that smelled like sugar cookies that I really liked. (Of course the time between the ceremony and the reception was so long that I got hungry, and tried to eat a piece of...yeah, bad idea. It did not taste as good as it smelled. But I think that the birds liked it...)

~donate the flowers to a hospital or rest home at the end of the day

I love Love LOVE this one. Donating anything that is unused, and repurposing anything that can be repurposed is the whole point. So this is the first time of many that I am going to mention a website called: The Special E. They will recycle, and repurose just about anything. (See the link) I am seriously considering using them for my wedding (depending on budget), and I will DEFINITELY be letting you all know how it goes. According to the site, they do what we would all do if we had the time:

"Toward the end of your event, we'll send out our "Rescue Squad" to pick up all the excess items that are leftover. We have an extensive list of food banks, homeless shelters, soup kitchens, hospitals, nursing homes, and charities across the country. Prior to each program, we'll identify the recipient organizations that will be receiving the leftovers, and take the necessary steps to coordinate all the delivery arrangements."

Um, can you give me a break? HOW AWESOME IS THAT??? I can't wait to speak with them further, and will keep you all updated.

Step 5-What to wear? (Oh, and I am going to be on TV...read on.)

Of course this is a big one, and as I mentioned before...I have not always been a fan of the "wedding dress." (See Left) It is hard for me to get this type of image out of my head, for some reason...and the idea of this girl busting a move to Sir Mix-a-lot wearing this ridiculous dress is just hard for me to swallow. (Sorry girl if you are out there, and if you busted said move-good for you! I am sure that you looked awesome...ehem.) But let's be serious, I am planning to be a DANCING FOOL at my wedding; as in: "Can't Touch This, Summer Lovin', Margaritaville, I will Survive...BRING IT! And I do not not NOT want to look like the long lost twin sister of my wedding cake! And I also, don't want to be wasteful. Let's face it, this is a big expense, and a lot of waste for something that you only wear once. So what to do? There are actually quite a few things you can do:

~go vintage (and update your look as necessary with tailoring and modern shoes and accessories)

Wear your Mom's dress, or one of your aunt's dresses. Or look in cool vintage shops for a super cool, one of a kind number. (PS, this option is also going to be much less expensive, so you can really go nuts with your accessories!)

~pick clothes made from hemp, bamboo, and organic cotton or silk--or find a dressmaker who will make a one-of-a-kind item out of these sustainable fabric (men's suits and shirts come in organic cotton or wool too)

Ok, so the words "hemp and bamboo" sort of scare me here...not in other contexts so much, but here...eeeehhhhhh, I get a little nervous, but check this out:

Have you heard of Kleinfelds? It is like the premiere place in NYC to buy a wedding dress, and they just launched a new line of dresses that are eco-friendly!!! It is called The Cotton Bride by Chris Kole. And guess what? I am going to be trying these dresses on in an episode of Say Yes To The Dress on TLC. We are filming next week, and I promise an expose post with all of the shenanigans that ensue!

So I am hopeful that I will find an eco-friendly dress here, that is simple and elegant, and that isn't strapless. (Why is that such a big look these days? What is the deal with brides and shoulders? And where are my fellow "Chesty LaRues?" Can we please unite about this? Someone give me a strap for the love of PETE!) Oh, and...BTW, I am thinking to get a super simple short dress to shake my booty in at the ceremony...don't tell Jimmy. ;-)

In the event that I don't find one...I could:

~borrow an elegant gown from a stylish friend

~buy something you'll wear again and let your bridesmaids do the same.

I am hoping that this will happen with the maids...we are going for Anne Taylor Celebrations, and the dresses seem to be super wearable, and aren't SOOOO dressy that you couldn't wear them to another wedding. Or we could go with the Chamelion Dress. Never heard of it? Click Here. Also-I am thinking to wear my short dress to all three of my celebrations (Wedding, Wedding Brunch, and Post Wedding Luau) and then, I might dye it and wear it again...we shall see...

By the way, this is a great site to find ways to be charitable during this process...take a few minutes and browse, for sure. For Bridesmaids, I love this one foundation called The Glass Slipper Project, you can donate dresses, and they go to young women for their proms, sweet 16's and Quinceaneros. Sadly, they are only in Chicago. That said they have a page on their site for out of state donations (link above), and it lists other foundations that do this...there should be one near you.
~accessorize with a unique recycled purse and/or jewelry
~use vegetable dyes on your shoes (or go barefoot for a beach wedding)
~accentuate natural beauty with all-natural makeup
~donate the dress to charity after the event

I love this idea, PS. There are some great charities out there to help Brides, and other young women who need a dress for a formal event...some favorites:

Brides Againts Breast Cancer

The I Do Foundation-

You know, I am surprised, but they don't mention rentals here, or ebay (buying used)...I was looking into renting, and found this article from NY Weddings 2005. It has a few options, and from what I can see, they are all still around. Not from NYC? I am sure that there are places near you that do it..give it a google, and see what comes up. I

I already bought my shoes on ebay, and they are deeeelightful. (And they were only 20 bucks.) I wasn't going to show you, but I am too proud of my idea...guess what? They are my "Something Blue!" I can't stand it!!!

That's right...20 BUCKS!!!

And, hey, let's just say that you want to buy a lavish extravegant Cinderella dress, and don't want to give it away when you are done, and don't want to waste one second feeling guilty!! ...my girlfriends and I have all agreed that after my wedding, we are having a fabulous cocktail party where we all wear "the dress"for one evening...and feel gorgeous all over again. Heck, let's do it once a year! I am pretty sure that that counts as recycling. Pictures to follow.

Step 4-Keep the Debauchery Local

Plan bachelor and bachelorette parties that will keep the green theme going:

~Stay local (and spend more time with your friends, and less dealing with travel stress).

Or you can skip the whole thing. I have always thought the "Bachelor and Bachelorette Parties" are the silliest game in town. For so many reasons...(See Left) First of all, why is this the last fun night of my life? If I am marrying the right person, shouldn't the fun be ahead of me? Also-Let's just say for arguments sake that this is the last fun night of my life, I am totally miffed at the inequality of the expected ideas of a "good time." Men get strippers, steak dinners, and cigars...Women get salad, a cake in the shape of a penis, and a tee shirt covered in life savers with the words, "A Buck A Suck" written across the front! How is that fun? How is this fair? They get women covered in glitter that smell like Malibu Barbie, and I get a baseball hat with a white veil coming out the back like a red neck mullet,dirty scavenger hunt? No no no...this is not my idea of fun.

Jimmy can do what he wants, and I am pretty sure that it will be ugly. (lol) I only have one rule about it: Whoever plans the party, gets to clean up the puke.

All of this said, I do want to have a night of fun with my girlfriends. I will be giving them a secret gift (which is part of a secret outing...sneaky me! I will post about it when we do it this summer. :-) And then there will be a night on the town with those who can make it as planned by a few friends.

We are doing this in NYC...there will be a few travelers, and they will most likely bus or train. :-)

So-as per my cosmo quiz theme: CHECK! Keeping it local! Same for Jimbo-when you live in NYC, you don't go upstate for the naked ladies.

~Offset your trip if you choose a "destination" party.

They mention this a lot on green webistes, but do you know how to do it? I didn't. I found this webpage on the Travelocity site. It allows you to offset miles by donating to have trees planted.

~Travel by train (and start the party early in the bar car).

~Indulge in organic wine (or beer) tasting or an organic spa treatment.

I am always happy to do any of these. Most places are starting to have local beers and wines these days. Where I live there are so many fun ways to keep it local. In Brooklyn, we have:

The Brooklyn Brewery (start your party with a tour of the brewery in Red Hook. How cool is that?)

We even have a winery! Try Bridge Vinyards Urban Winery...I haven't been there, so I can't tell you if the wine is good, but it is certainly worth a look see, no? Check out their site:http://www.bridgevineyards.com They don't take reservations, but they do have Jazz music. Hmmm...Ok, I will take one for the team, and go here with Jimmy in the near future, and will give a full report.

And um, hi, organic spa? I am not usually cool enough to hang out in Williamsburg, but I will go there for the delightful green spa. http://www.greenspanewyork.com/

If you aren't sure where to find a spa in your area, check out spa finder...it is a super cool site where you can search for the spa that is the perfect fit for you.

~Take a class and learn to make your own wedding flowers or jewelry.

This is a cool idea, and it would save you money on your flowers, or jewelry....I dig this one.

~Do something low-impact and outdoorsy like a camping, surfing, sailing, kayaking, or fishing trip.

um, yeah...have fun with that. I will see you when you get back to Brooklyn.

Step 3-Invitations!

I couldn't think of any sort of clever title for this entry, so there it is: Invitations! You get the point though, right?

The gang at the Sierra Club has this to say:

Your invitation is the first impression guests will get of your green wedding. Look for:

~recycled, handmade, or plantable papers processed chlorine-free and printed with vegetable- or soy-based inks

I love love love! Paper, and cards, and invitations, and truly cannot WAIT for this part of the process. I am making my own cards on my HP printer with Printing Press Platinum. I bought it off of the mountain cow site. www.mountaincow.com And PS, I think that this is a great site. I am planning to do EVERYTHING with this software: Invites, Menus, Programs, you name it... I am not sure if I can do soy ink in my HP, but I am definitely using recycled materials...I will post pictures as soon as they are done! :-)

I found a few sites that you can purchase recycled card stock: I think that I might be using a store called On Paper in Columbus, OH. www.onpaper.com They seem to have the colors and shapes that I am looking for.

Depending on how creative you are, you can make your invites without a computer. (Actually by hand, you know?)

you can also try:

~tree-free paper made out of hemp, banana stalks, bamboo, kenaf, or organic cotton

~a printer who will use paper with a high percentage of post-consumer recycled content

There are a LOT of printers out there who will do this now. Even if they don't advertise, feel free to check with the popular local companies to see if they have an eco-friendly line...you'd be surprised what is out there these days!

Don't believe me? Here is an entry from one of my favorite blogs: eco-chic weddings, by Emily Anderson This post is from 2007, but the blog is great, links are still helpful.

And keep this in mind:

~papers that aren't metallic or plastic-coated, characteristics that make them hard to recycle

~opportunities to reduce paper use, like sending a postcard (instead of multi-enveloped notes) for your save-the-date, or using online invitations and a wedding blog to let people know about the bachelor/ette parties, rehearsal dinner, and gift registry

~In your invitations, let guests know about the ecofriendly hotel and transportation options in your area, whether it's hybrid rental cars or directions to the ceremony on public transportation. And don't forget to pick up some extra green paper products for your guest book, place cards, and thank-you notes.


...and for the invites for your post wedding luau. ;-)

Step 2: Oh, the places you'll go! (and how you'll get there...)

So the Sierra Club says that the next thing to do when going green is to think about your:

location:
Location:
LOCATION!!!!:

Your choice of venue sets the tone for your wedding day--and accounts for a big chunk of the money you'll be laying out. Spend it wisely! Consider:


~choosing a setting that's convenient to the most guests to minimize travel impacts

This we are sort of doing...about 50% of the guests are local.

~having the ceremony and the reception at the same place, or providing eco-friendly transportation between them

Ding Ding Ding! Except for some possibly very old guests...we are WALKING from the church to the reception! (I would say Check here...walking is a green as it gets!)

~picking a unique local spot--like an art gallery, nonprofit space, organic restaurant or farm, green hotel, botanical garden, or green-roofed building--that supports a cause you believe in.

We are having the reception at an old social club in Brooklyn called "The Montauk Club." www.montaukclub.com



I am not sure if it is an eco-friendly site, but I am looking into ways that we can repurpose most of our waste (more on that later). The cause that it is supporting for now is my love of the fact that it looks like Hogwarts, where Harry Potter went to school. Does that count?

~an outdoor setting that will infuse the whole event with a natural sensibility (and require less decorating too!)

~arriving at the ceremony in a horse-drawn carriage, cycle rickshaw, or hybrid car

ok, so we are also doing the cycle rickshaw for the wedding party (for the girls to the ceremony, and for everyone to the spot for photos, and back to the reception.) I was hoping to wow everyone here with this idea, but it seems that it has been done before. sigh...this will not be keeping me down, however, RICKSHAW!!!! CHECK!


This is me, gazing at Jimmy as he pedals a rickshaw cycle...I love to gaze at him...

offsetting your guests' travel (or asking them to do it as your wedding gift)

Sadly, I will not be asking for guests to do this as my gift. The idea of the donation gift is awesome, but here is the skinny: I need the gifts. We are not rich, and the wedding is not cheap. So bring on the gifts, yo! I am sure that mother earth will understand that I am doing a bunch of other things, won't she?



Mother Earth? E-hem...Mother? Mom? (She looks busy...I'll check back later.)

Step 1 (you cut a hole in the box...)

According to the Sierra Club:

A green wedding begins where any engagement does: with a ring. Don't start off on a sour note. The beautiful alternatives to "blood diamonds" (those that are mined in war zones and fund conflicts) include:

~vintage rings, whether a family heirloom or an antique find (you can even have old gold melted down and refashioned)

Hello!! I am, as we speak, wearing my grandmother's engagement ring...CHECK!
Some other great options:

~lab-created diamonds (greenKarat's are set in recycled gold too)

~diamonds mined in peaceful Canada or Australia, like those from Brilliant Earth, Cred Jewellery, or Leber Jewelry's Earthwise line

~diamonds certified as "conflict-free" under the Kimberley Process, an ongoing effort to reform diamond mining in Africa (ask your jeweler the questions in Amnesty International's buyer's guide)

this is super important...no jewelry is so important that it is worth supporting bloodshed...so really look for a conflict free diamond...that buyers guide that they reference is right here: http://www.amnestyusa.org/diamonds/BuyersGuide.pdf

~one-of-a-kind wooden bands



Ok, so this may be mostly for Elves, and other woodland folk, but you get the idea here. You have a lot of options, so exercize your right to choose! (an eco-friendly engagement ring!) This is something that is just for you, so don't worry what anyone else thinks. Even if you want the wooden ring. Arwen was a lovely elf...think of yourself as Arwen...



For those non nerds of you (aka, my sister) that was a Lord of the Rings reference. Although, the true nerds will know that Elven made metals are the finest in all of Middle Earth, so she would never have a wooden ring. (She would have had one ring to rule them all...snort..)

My New Checklist! 10 Steps to a Green Wedding

So every bridal magazine and it's mother has a "wedding checklist" for you to follow. (12 months ahead you should call the caterer, 6 months ahead you should order the cocktail napkins with your name on them, 1 month ahead you should buy your ticket to Timbuktu to escape the whole thing, and call it a day.) I work for a company called...wait for it...wait for it...Cross It Off Your List. (It is a professional organizing company..yes it exists. Don't believe me? www.crossitoffyourlist.com )So I am very familiar with lists. I love them...I NEED them. I have about 25 of them for my upcoming wedding, but what about a green wedding checklist? I had no idea where to start. I needed a little help, so I did a little looking around, and looky what I found:

According to the green life blog on the website for the Sierra Club, http://sierraclub.typepad.com/greenlife there are 10 steps to a Green Wedding...so let's pretend that this is the newest Cosmo Quiz shall we? (I love quizes, and tests now that I am out of school.)

So I will now take each of the 10 ways (one per post), and see if I am taking full advantage of the "greeny mcgreen pants" options available to me...feel free to play along. You know you wanna.

Why I am going Green...

It took me a while to come to the conclusion that weddings are a truly wonderful occasion. When I first set out on this adventure known as "engagement," I wasn't sold on the whole concept of "the wedding." They seemed to be these large, generic, wasteful, and worst of all EXPENSIVE parties where everyone complained that the food sucked, and they never got to see the bride...

What I started to realize a few months ago is that a wedding can be anything you want it to be: It can be small, it can be large. It can be where you live, it can be where you were born, heck it can be in Fiji...there is only one thing that every wedding absolutely must be; and that is a celebration.

It is a celebration of life. It is a celebration of your life, and your new spouses life, and the lives of everyone invited to share in your big day. So that became my new golden rule. Don't forget to celebrate.

Once I realized that I was preparing a celebration for everyone that I loved, I became much more relaxed with the idea of the whole thing: the dress wasn't just a stupid piece of fabric designed to make me look like a living cupcake,


(yes, my boobs are that big...)

It was a nod to history, and a way of showing my guests how very special this occasion is to me, and how very seriously I take this day. In fact, every little detail started to make sense...napkins, and flowers, and invitations...they were all little ways that I could surprise and delight my guests to thank them for being a part of my life at this moment. Even the little things that used to annoy me (like how hard it is to avoid green beans on a wedding menu), didn't really matter as much in the scope of the event...(although, seriously...I hate green beans.) There is only one thing that I am still struggling with: THE WASTE.

The waste, The Waste, THE WASTE!!!! All of the paper, and extra food, and travel, and shipping, and who knows what else that I can't even imagine amount to a lot of W-A-S-T-E...and I am in unfamiliar territory as to how I should deal with it.

I mean, I carry reusable bags in my purse for the unexpected grocery trip. I buy my produce at the farmers market to "keep it local." I have a "recycling center" in my kitchen for paper, aluminum, plastic and glass; but this is a 120 person EVENT for Pete's sake! Not to mention the shower(s) and batchelorette and rehearsal dinner and wedding brunch, and post wedding luau in Massachusetts.

this is me and Jimmy, my fiance, back when we were Hawaiian...

(Shouldn't everyone have a post wedding luau? I smell a new tradition: Something old, something new, something borrowed, something from Hawaii) Ok, now I am rambling, but here is the point:

I want my wedding to be FUN, I need my wedding to be CHEAP, and EASY (like I was in college)....and I am going to do everything in my power to make it GREEN!!!

Would you like to come with me on this journey? I thought that you might...